day twenty six: your religious beliefs

Sometimes I really strongly believe there is a heaven and God and all of that. But sometimes I just can't, it seems to idealistic. I really want to believe. I think a part of me is quite religious. I enjoy going to church, I like the feeling that there is a god watching over me. I talk to God sometimes in my head, or I pray. I think if I'm going through something really difficult I like to think he is there for me but sometimes I don't think he is. Although there is this one thing that I love to read, the end gives me goosebumps. Here it is:

One night I had a dream--

I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord
and across the sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene I noticed two sets of footprints,
one belonged to me and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that many times along the path of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest
and saddest times in my life.
This really bothered me and I questioned the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you would walk with me all the way,
but I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life
there is only one set of footprints.
"I don't understand why in times when I needed you most,
you should leave me."
The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child,
I love you and I would never, never leave you
during your times of trial and suffering.
"When you saw only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

I love this poem a lot, and it does make me want to believe a lot more. I guess I'm not really entirely religious since I have doubt. But then, I doubt a lot of things, sometimes I doubt that my friends really care but that doesn't mean they aren't real and aren't really there? So when I put it like that I guess doubt doesn't matter and will never take away from the truth. If he is real, and I want to think he is, then that's good. And the god I think of doesn't judge, I don't believe in all that "if you sin you'll go to hell" stuff because to me, god is an accepting and loving man who can accept everyone. This thought always comforts me, because then i don't feel as bad for doubting him. I think religion can be a really powerful thing, and it can bring people together. However it can also tear people apart, and I think it's really dumb when people try to force their religion on other people. Let us believe what we choose to believe, that's why we have freedom of religion after all.